Or other relatives for that matter. This has been an ongoing issue for me, because my husband’s 8 1/2 year old niece still sleeps in the bed with his parents (her grandparents). I personally feel that it is inappropriate because of: 1) her age and 2) she’s a girl. Also, my father inlaw usually sleeps in a wife beater (sort of a tank top for those of you who don’t know what that is) and underwear. Not boxers … regular Fruit of the Loom underwear. My mother inlaw sleeps in a night gown, which is fine.
She spent the night with us a couple of times and flat out told my husband she was not going to sleep in another room by herself. We have a guest room and she didn’t want to sleep in there. I understood that she may be a little freaked out, so I told my husband to pull out the air mattress or bring the futon from the other room and let her sleep in the living room (which is right next to our room). I went to wash my hair and got ready to go to bed and she was in our bed …
With my husband. I slept on the floor on an air mattress because I felt uncomfortable. I have know her for the past four years, but I don’t think it’s appropriate to sleep with other people’s kids. Her mother barely knows me. Her father (my husband’s adopted brother) knows me a little but we aren’t close or anything.
I expressed my concern to my husband and he got offended (as usual when it comes to his niece). He eventually admitted that he thought it was wrong to do but is too scared to speak up to his mother (another issue in itself). I don’t want to ruin my relationship with my inlaws so that’s the only reason why I won’t say anything. They’re very protective of this child and get overly defensive when it comes to her.
What are your thoughts?
The girl lives with her mother but spends 80-90% of the time at my inlaws. Her father sees her every now and then. My mother inlaw is a bit of a control freak so she enjoys having so much control over the child. Neither of her parents really have time for her. So the fact that she can go to my inlaws anytime she wants (literally) is right up their alley. It seems to be a convenience for everyone involved, and my inlaws are too obsessed with this child to see that the things they do and allow will hurt her in the long run.
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